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Why It’s OK to Say “No”
How selfless givers can think again.
When I was a young curate many years ago, there were several people who would phone me on a Sunday lunchtime, not because they needed to, but because they knew that I would be at home, having lunch, before the afternoon and evening services. No respite!
People like us are supposed to be available 24/7
As a result, I had a separate phone line put in, (with a different ringtone), so that I knew if a call was personal or professional. If the professional phone rang, I learnt to ignore it and let the answering service take a message. If the personal one rang, I would answer it.
Can you imagine how guilty I felt about that? You probably feel the same thing, especially if you are in a caring profession. People like us are supposed to be available 24/7, and there were many times in my life and work when I felt that I should just be ready at the church door for whenever someone knocked.
But now I am giving you permission to think about yourself. I have learned that there are great spiritual benefits in having a teeny-weeny bit of selfishness (or more).
What do you say to someone who says “I really need to speak to you now?” Well, of course, we’re here for people who need us. But if it…